According to the Associated Press, a father of a 12 y/o girl is pressing charges against her because of her taking his car without permission. According to the dad, this is her second time doing this (as far as he knows). This time she crashed into of all things, a police car.
Some would criticize the dad for what he is doing thinking that this will be too traumatic for his little 12 y/o girl. Others would probably just not press charges because this is his daughter we are talking about; his flesh and blood.
Would you press charges?
This dad is looking at the big picture. This is one of the most loving things he could do. He wants to nip-it-in-the-bud. He would rather have to deal with this than to maybe one day be burying his daughter or having her doing something far more serious.
So many parents have been overlooked such behaviors in their children thinking it is only childish things that will go away, only to find out that the “childish thing” doesn’t go away. It only got more sophisticated and bigger.
As painful as it is for him and her, it is pain that he would rather endure with the hopes of lessening the pain of the future. This is tough love! What do you think?
"who are you & what do you want" ... good read"
I think it’s a little extreme since this is the second time she has done it. What was her punishment the first time she did?? Maybe it wasn’t severe enough. This method of discipline doesn’t seem sensible. I can understand him wanting to “nip-it-in-the-bud” but I believe that there are other steps that could be taken. However, he would hopefull yknow his daughter well enough that he feels this punishment will teach her something and not looking for someone else to take on his responsibility as disciplinarian.
Shivyj, I hear what you are saying. However don’t you think that the punishment is equivalent to the crime? Do you think that this father is trying to “mirror” what the real world would do if that had happened if she was an adult? I’m not sure if there was anything done for the 1st time. Maybe that is where he went wrong why she thought nothing of doing it a second time. Maybe if there was a consequence, it wasn’t severe enough.
Well, I wonder what the police would have done to her (in light that she is a minor) had her father not pressed charges against her. If she was an adult, then yes pressing charges would fit what was done.
hmmmh. Interesting take. So if I’m hearing you, its because of her age why this should be handled differently? If so, at what age would it be okay for charges to be pressed?
I would of course do what this dad has done especially if it wasnt the first time she has done this. With raising these kids now a days you have to stop their wrong doing write a way so they wont do it again. You see she steals her fathers car and he just yells at her or grounds her. That doesnt have any affect on her so as she gets older what do think she is going to do. Steal other poeple cars and she might just be in much more trouble than what her father is doing. She might try to steal a car and the takes a shot at her and kills her or paralize her then the father is the one who feels the pain and will say I should have done something more serious about the situatuation. So you have to do things that would make the child know the real punishment of what they have done. Life is not fun when dont follow the rules, we all have to teach our kids what the consequinces are in life if they do things like Rob, Steal, Kill, Fight, Disreaspect parents and their elders and so on.
Kyle, these are some very insightful thoughts and ones that suggest that you are one who believes in the “tough love” principle. Many more parents need to realize true love must at times be tough.
I agree with the dad, if she’s only 12 and acting out like that, not once but twice; I’d be afraid to see what she does when she really hits the rebellious years. Although most teenagers nowadays look grown, their brains haven’t fully developed so they can’t see some things rationally. Telling them what the consequences of their actions are going to be doesn’t always sink in as opposed to showing them what the consequences are. If I were the dad, I may have done it a little differently by maybe having them stage her booking and even putting her in a cell by herself for a few hours; it may seem drastic, but like the father said, I rather deal with this than be burying her and wishing I had done something a little more drastic while she was alive!
Chantel, I like your idea of the temporary holding just to shake her up a little. I guess the law wouldn’t allow that. She may be charged, but released to the care of her dad.